The Movie Empress

enough

Johnny Depp is either eating chicken wings or he's chewing gum, too.  Do they give out chiclets at the entrance? 

A direct quote from my friend, Ms. Ann

"Okay diablo, we love that you're emotional, and that you wrote such a cool movie, but we don't love that you're wearing a me-jane coochie-showing gown, and what look to be flip flops."

Masters of Understatement

I think calling Patrick Dempsey "handsome" is putting it a bit mildly.

Nicole Kidman

Nicole Kidman is displaying another fashionable satin baby bump, but she needs to swing those diamonds from around her right boob, since at first glance it looked like a peculiarly asymmetric breast adornment.

Best Actress. Already?

Love Julie Christie's dress & jewelry.

William Hurt looks like he wants to bite Marion Cotillard's neck.

A Few Fashion Observations.

Ruby Dee looked very stately.

James McAvoy needs a facial waxing.

Jack Nicholson's teeth are a bit yellow, which only adds to the portly, bespectacled wolf appearance.

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George Clooney, or someone on his staff, knows how to select a tux. 

Aaaaaaaand... it's the first montage.  I like it, though..  it's about the Oscars...  and it's reminding me of how luck I was to not be watching during some of those dance numbers.

WHY COULD WE NOT MAKE IT THROUGH ONE OSCAR TELECAST WITHOUT CELINE DION?  WHY WHY WHY alkcjodaifjoaiejroiHOFEIHSDLKJFLKSDJDSLJFK

I still miss Billy Crystal.

The audience doesn't like Jon Stewart very much.  They didn't two years ago, either.  It makes for a shaky monologue.  But , "Too often the Academy ignores movies that aren't good," was PRICELESS.

Boy, put Diablo Cody in a line-up with Helen Mirren, Cate Blanchett, and George Clooney, and no one would ever guess which one was the former stripper.

It's just so odd to hear Jon Stewart sucking up. 

Rebecca Miller

Upon further reflection, I think Rebecca Miller came as Edith Piaf.

ETA: Please, please, please.  Tell me Daniel Day-Lewis is NOT CHEWING GUM.

Notes from the Red Carpet

John Travolta's hair was not obtained by any human-growth-related process, was it?

Regis annoys me, but I have a special fondness for Samantha, going back to Dancing with the Stars.  Speaking of which, Marlee Matlin wouldn't be doing the next season for the money or anything, would she?